One of the most harmful patterns I’ve experienced personally—and consistently observed in the leaders I coach—is the way we misunderstand clarity.
When leaders know a shift is necessary but they’re slow to act, it’s often because they don’t yet feel “clear.” They want to feel sure the decision they are making is the right one before they move. They want confidence that the relationship will improve, the new role will work out, the business will succeed, or the transition will ultimately make sense.
But that’s not really how shift works. And honestly, that’s not clarity they’re seeking. It’s certainty.
The need for certainty is what triggers the fight, flight, or freeze. It’s what keeps leaders overfunctioning in environments they have already outgrown. It’s what keeps people trapped in unhealthy relationships, misaligned organizations, exhausting partnerships, and outdated ways of being long after something inside them already knows a shift is necessary.
We wait for guarantees.
We wait for the perfect plan.
We wait for proof that everything will work out before we move.
But certainty is not available, at least not in the form of a guaranteed outcome. What can be clear, though, is that a shift is necessary. From there, we work to build confidence.
That distinction changed my life
When I First Learned the Difference
Before starting my business, I served as the executive director of a shelter and transitional housing program for young pregnant mothers. The work was deeply meaningful to me because it connected personally to my own story. I loved the mission, the impact, and the opportunity to help stabilize systems and support vulnerable families.
But after several years, I realized something difficult: I had outgrown the role.
Not because the organization lacked value and not because the work was unimportant. In many ways, it was the opposite. I had worked tirelessly to strengthen systems, support the team, and help move the organization forward. But I also recognized something about myself fairly early in my leadership journey: I love solving problems, building systems, and helping organizations navigate transition. Once the challenge that initially called me into a space begins to stabilize, I naturally start looking toward what’s next.
At the time, I dreamed of building a consulting practice focused on interim leadership and organizational transitions. The problem was that I didn’t know any entrepreneurs. I had no roadmap, no examples, and no real understanding of what it meant to build a business from scratch. I was terrified.
So instead of fully making the leap, I hesitated.
I gave notice to my board six months in advance because I thought giving myself time would make me feel more prepared. But when the time came, I still didn’t feel “clear,” so I convinced myself I needed a safer transition. I accepted another role at a different agency, intentionally taking a lower-level position because I thought it would give me more balance and more time to prepare for entrepreneurship.
Instead, it became one of the most difficult professional experiences of my career.
The leadership dynamics were unhealthy. There were significant personnel issues, insecurity, and misalignment around leadership and authority. Ultimately, the environment became unsustainable and resulted in a severanced resignation. This gave me the “clarity” I needed to launch my business.
Not because I suddenly became certain.
And not because I finally had all the answers.
But because eventually I had enough clarity to recognize the shift was necessary and enough confidence to take the next aligned step.
Staying Too Long Happens Everywhere
Since then, I’ve seen this same pattern repeat itself over and over again, both personally and professionally.
I’ve coached leaders who had long outgrown their roles but stayed because they were waiting for absolute clarity before making a move. I’ve worked with founders who knew their organizations needed to evolve but struggled to release outdated structures and ways of leading. I’ve supported executives who were exhausted, undervalued, or deeply misaligned with their organizational culture but continued overfunctioning because leaving felt too uncertain.
And honestly, I understand it.
Leaving a role, relationship, partnership, business model, or identity often requires grieving who we thought we were going to be. It requires disrupting systems that may no longer fit but still feel familiar. It requires trusting ourselves enough to move before we know exactly how everything will unfold.
That is uncomfortable work.
But staying too long has a cost too.
Over time, misalignment impacts our mood, our confidence, our health, our trajectory, our relationships, and our ability to think creatively and strategically. We start performing instead of living purposefully. We become so focused on surviving what no longer fits that we lose connection to what’s actually possible.
We Are the Shift
One of the most important things I’ve learned is this:
We are not waiting for the shift.
We are the shift.
So often, we wait for permission, guarantees, or perfect conditions before we allow ourselves to move forward. We convince ourselves that once we feel fully certain, then we’ll finally make the decision, have the hard conversation, launch the business, leave the role, redefine the relationship, or embrace the next version of ourselves.
But sustainable change rarely begins with certainty.
It begins with enough clarity to recognize what is no longer aligned and enough confidence to take the next step anyway.
That does not mean recklessness or impulsivity. It does not mean abandoning wisdom or making emotionally reactive decisions. It means understanding that movement itself is often what creates the additional clarity we were hoping to have before we started.
This is the essence of the Make Shift Happen model.
Clarity is recognizing the truth.
Confidence is trusting ourselves enough to move.
Capacity is built through aligned action.
And community is what sustains us while we navigate the shift.
The goal is not to guarantee the outcome before movement happens.
The goal is to trust ourselves enough to begin.
